Once upon a time, many years ago, I worked for two patent attorneys at Union Carbide in Danbury, CT. During my two years there, I became familiar with the formality of patent jargon which led me to wonder what would have happened if God had had to apply for a patent before making humans. Here's the lighthearted result of my musings. Let me know what you think.
IF GOD HAD TO APPLY TO THE PATENT OFFICE
IN THE UNITED STATES PATENT AND TRADEMARK OFFICE
Hon. Commissioner of Patents and Trademarks
The present invention relates to the manufacture of a homo sapien of
the female genus.
The principal object of this invention is to provide an improvement over
the prior art which consists of U. S. Patent No.1, which teaches the
manufacture of a homo sapien of the male genus.
As can be seen by the accompanying drawings:
FIG. 1 is a side view of the present invention, showing a considerable
improvement in the overall lines, contours and curves of the No.1
FIG. 2 is a rear view.
FIG. 3 is a front view. It will be obvious to anyone skilled in the art that
considerable changes have been made over the prior art.
In addition, it should be noted that in the present invention, the
shoulders are narrower and the hips are wider than in the prior art,
allowing for a major improvement in that the invention possesses the
capability to contain within itself an exact duplication of itself, or of the
male genus of the prior art, albeit on a smaller scale. This capability
also affords the advantage for the shape of the instant invention to
increase or grow in size over a period of nine months.
It should be further noted that the present invention has one more rib
than the previous invention, thereby increasing the strength and
stability of same.
BEST MODE OF THE INVENTION
The best mode of the subject invention is to present an improvement
over U. S. Patent No.1; to provide a complement to the No.1 patent;
and to provide a means for reproducing itself, either in kind or similar to
the genus of the No.1 patent.
What is claimed is:
1. A homo sapien of the female genus possessing reproductive
Applicant respectfully requests that this application be favorably considered,
allowed and passed to issue at an early date.